I'm really not in a bad mood today, but I felt the need for a "bitch post". Sometimes this is just something ya gotta do. Its nothing that requires action - just to vent.
1. Work is TOO FREAKIN' BORING !!! I know that I do probably 90% of the billing for the freight the company hauls, and there are a lot of people who depend on what I do for their paychecks - but look. I'm sitting here blogging - mainly because I've caught up on FaceBook already! Just a few years ago, there were 3 of us working our butts off all day long in this department. Now its just me. Don't get me wrong- I'm thankful to still have a job when there are so many out there without one.
2. I want to tear down my house & rebuild! I like the neighborhood so I don't want to move - unless it's totally drastic like out of state. I'd like a basement, but really isn't necessary. A laundry room that is big enough for a place to hang clothes up and a table to fold on. My wonderful new HE washer & dryer need something more impressive than the furnace closet. Randy needs his own room. I want to take all his cool old QSL cards & put them in huge poster frames. Then he can have all his radio & computer stuff someplace other than our bedroom. And (selfishly) I won't have to hear his late night gabfests on the radio or when the evil work beeper goes off. And a family room! So Angel can still park her butt in front of the TV and I can use the Wii or watch the hockey game at the same time. That would mean 2 Christmas trees, too! One extremely traditional one with glass ball ornaments & one funky one!!!!
3. I could just strangle the girl. School is for learning - not social hour !!!! I don't ask for honor roll caliber work - just get every assignment done & turn it in! I don't think that's expecting much! I know there are parents out there who demand excellence - but how do they get the kid to produce???? Do they go to each class every day and hold the kid's hand and walk them to teacher's desk to turn the paper in?? I just don't get it. Do you have no pride?? As a parent, I think its a huge embarrassment to go to conferences and the teachers keep telling me she could easily be an A/B student if she'd just turn assignments in!!! I truly hate going. When I was a kid, it never occurred to me NOT to do my homework & turn it in! I was mortified the few times I'd forgotten an assignment.
4. And some more about the girl.....she can't possibly be that freakin' ditzy !! We do not live in a sitcom, and therefore you do not need to act stoopid like those people on TV. They are "ACTORS", you are not. Like pretending not to hear me then suddenly shaking her head and saying "Oh! What?" Come on. And there is NO WAY she is going to get away with thinking Randy & I are as dumb as the parents on the shows she watches.
5. Girl - don't bother lying. We can tell & you look like a moron. Especially when the proof is staring you in the face. It's really OK to admit you're wrong or made a mistake. That actually makes you look like a better person anyway.
6. I really wish I could get help around the house. I'm not pointing fingers at who the problem is, because I accept my share of the mess-making blame. This also goes back to #2. The house is just too small & there's no place to put anything. We have a lot of stuff. I've been trying to get rid of excess clutter, but it doesn't look any different! I'm not the only one who can toss a load of laundry into the washer or fold the clothes when its done. So the pile of clean clothes stays in a pile on the couch (because I don't have a laundry room!) until I get around to folding it. I'm not the only one who can load and/or unload the dishwasher. So the dirty dishes pile up in the sink while clean ones sit in there. Etc, etc, etc, etc.
7. I hate that my skin tends to be nasty. My shoulders are scarred from acne, my belly has stretch marks, etc.
8. I wonder what my purpose in life is. Right now I'm Randy's wife & Angel's mom. I don't see us having any kids, so it's not like I'm going to birth the next president or anything. Yeah - I don't see Miss Angela as being president. She'd want the flag to be bedazzled & the White House painted lime green. This is the same kid who -when asked what the country directly south of us is - said it's Margaritaville. Anyway, I'd like to give Randy a kid, but it's been a long time since I've dealt with a baby. I don't think he fully understands how they change your life anyway. Angel was 4 when he met us. They're totally high maintenance & I've gotten lazy. Plus I think I'm too old. I've been off the Pill for almost 4 years now... I don't think it's going to happen naturally. But I still get that little twinge thru the heart when I see someone with a little one.
But you know what? The blessings in my life totally outweigh the stuff I listed (and that I didn't list). I have a wonderful husband who makes me happy & is a great provider. My kid is happy & healthy & generally a good kid. I have my health & a cozy home & an income & a reliable car. I know that the Lord loves us & has a plan (that I wish He'd let me know!!) for us all.